Friday, June 24, 2016

Thoughts for the week #5 - sexuality

I've decided to start casually inserting the fact that I am bisexual (synonymous with pansexual and queer to me, but I prefer bi) into relevant conversations. I don't really want the big "coming out" story and my hope is that someday people will be able to just toss their sexuality out there as a fact with it being completely not a big deal. "Got a crush on any girls in class, Timmy?" "Actually, I'm gay, but still no." "Maybe you'll find a cute boy at summer camp!" Or even better: "Got a crush on anyone in class?"

Realizing and accepting that this is my sexuality took a very long time. I only admitted it to myself last year. So Mara Wilson's story really rung a bell with me. There are plenty of reasons to be scared. I have mostly been consumed by the potential reaction of people who have defined my sexuality for me. I don't want to have to argue or defend who I am.

But here I am in a relatively safe position: married to a cis-man, appearing heteronormative, in a fairly liberal area and state. I don't want to contribute to the silence and taboo surrounding bisexuality anymore. I know I'm going to get obnoxious questions, but I think it'll be worth it.

So, to knock a few out of the way:

  • Being married to a man does not make me straight, just as gay people married to someone of a different gender are still gay.
  • Being bisexual does not mean I'm going to cheat on my husband. I am strictly monogamous. It just means that had my life not gone the way that it did, dating and marrying anyone who is not a man was an option. Well, that's assuming I came to terms with being bi a long time ago instead of a year ago.
  • Are you attracted to every person of your preferred gender that you see walking down the street? No, and neither am I.
  • If you're going to make some lesbian porn joke, just please stop talking.
Other than those, I suppose I'll entertain some questions if anybody has them.

And that turned into kind of a specific post instead of random thoughts for the week, but oh well!

GIF of the week
View post on imgur.com


Photo of the week

From my birthday! It was a good day.

Friday, June 17, 2016

Thoughts for the week #4

Yeap, I already missed a weekly installment.

  • Skyrim is getting re-mastered and all the fans are going, "...why? My mods already do this." Well, it's more for the console gamers (PS3, PS4, and Xbox One), who never got to use the mods that PC gamers could. This will open up that option to them through a Bethesda-managed console store, much like Fallout 4 has now. I think that's great since the game can be improved so much through all of the free mods out there, but my game already looks pretty great. I'll be checking it out regardless.
  • I don't even want to talk about the shooting in Orlando. It's horrifying. My heart goes out to the communities, families, and friends that were affected. We have to do something about the accessibility of guns in this country. We have to do something about the homophobia in this country. We have to do something about the Islamophobia in this country.
  • Cultivating self-esteem can be hard. I believe it's important to set a good example for kids by overtly treating ourselves with respect. It's easy to not think about it as we make off-hand comments about our bodies, but kids listen.
  • I think I need to read this: The Joy of Leaving Your Sh*t All Over the Place

Photo of the week

My recent character in Skyrim.
GIF of the week


Thursday, June 02, 2016

Thoughts for the week #3


  • It occurred to me this morning that as long as I keep these weekly posts going with no breaks, I'll know exactly how long I've been doing them. 52 editions later will be a year! We'll see about that.
  • It's June and I'm excited because -- My birthday is soon! In just two more payments, I'll be down to one student loan and that should be paid off sometime next year (if all goes according to plan). We have VIP tickets to see Motion City Soundtrack in less than two weeks!
  • I'm trying out Mint.com for budgeting again, now that our credit union is compatible with their site. I have been having fun setting up virtual budgets so we can track our spending in some common overspending categories (restaurant/fast food, movies). I have lofty savings goals for this year and I'm hoping that this helps us make it.
  • I kind of want this swimsuit. Not having to slather my arms in sunscreen would be pretty awesome. I know you can get rash guard shirts (I have one), but this is all-in-one! I don't particularly care about getting tan lines either.
  • Look at this pretty fabric that I bought! I'm limiting my hobby-related purchases this month. I got two new feet for my sewing machine (walking & vertical overlock) and will get matching thread as well as some complementary fabric in a single color. I'm thinking either a dark blue or some kind of green (darker). I have no idea what I want to make with this fabric, but I bought 3 yards. I also have no idea why I'm suddenly really into these kind of tropical floral prints.

GIF of the week
Probably my most favorite GIF ever.
Photo of the week
I was trying to get a tattoo on Memorial Day... I didn't, but I did finish the outline for another Neko Atsume cross stitch.