Today, I’m not writing about giving thanks. I’m writing about resolve. This year was all about health for me. I struggled in all aspects of it. Sometimes, it was the way I ate. Other times, it was the way I thought. I hit some really low points, repeatedly, but I also had some really high moments. This year is the first time in ages that I felt like I was able to think clearly and experience long periods of time free of anxiety or depression. When I compare this feeling and behavior to past years, I actually cannot remember ever feeling like this before.
Some of the progress I’ve made over the past year is through changing words in my thought process. Is it that I “shouldn’t” eat this French fry, which was born in a vat of rancid and hydrogenated oils, and will make my knee hurt and stomach bloat? Or is it that I “can’t”, because my health is worth more to me than a brief, but satisfying, crunch? My diet is not like most of the ones that people eat around me. To many, it seems restrictive. To me, it is essential. I do not feel saddened by not eating donuts for breakfast, lunch, dinner, which is something that I used to be able to do, seemingly, without consequences. Now, even smaller amounts of refined sugar are problematic for me, both for body and mind. If giving up sugar, wheat, soy (which I’m sensitive to anyway), and legumes leads me to be happier and healthier, that’s excellent! I still have a lot of options for food. Who doesn’t love meat and potatoes, after all? (Crazy people, that’s who…and vegans.) I don’t understand why/how people get so emotionally attached or defensive over things like a bad of chips. Why is that such a difficult thing to give up? The addictive properties of some of the ingredients in processed foods could certainly play a role. I won’t pretend to understand: I was never a big junk food eater. But pastries, man! I could eat bread stuff all day. No longer.
|This photo just made me giggle.|
After discussing a friend’s between-holidays plans, I’m contemplating sticking to a whole Whole30 plan after Thanksgiving until Christmas. It’s easy for me to say “except butter” or “except yogurt” or “I’ll have wine just this once”, but the whole point of the plan is to be 100% compliant to it. That way, you can know for sure if you are experiencing improvements. I don’t know if I’ll be able to be 100%, but I am going to try my best. My health depends on it.