Monday, July 19, 2010

Thoughts on night-owls

A couple nights ago, I wrote a really beautiful little piece...but unfortunately it was in my head, and I might've still been a bit tipsy. So the beauty of it is debatable, and I couldn't remember what it was about until I backtracked a little bit in my head. See, I used to write things on my forehead, with my finger, before I'd go to sleep so I could remember them later. It nearly always works for me. I used to outline the word "DREAM" on my forehead, the letters overlapping on top of each other in the center of my forehead, and in the morning, I could almost always remember my dreams long enough to write them down. And I had some *weird* dreams. I can thank the Prozac for that. So the other night, I did this trick again, but I only remembered the word a little while ago while I was trying to sleep (and failing, thanks to eating half a pizza and a molten lava cake from Dominos...ugh, stuffed). "DARK". What did I want to write about darkness? This is all I can remember.


Recently my sleep schedule has changed rather drastically. I got pretty used to a fairly "normal" wake-up schedule during my last year in college, and the summer before. Working full-time, 35 hrs a week, Monday through Friday, for a summer really got me on a cycle. I would get up at 8am, or a little after depending on when I was going to shower, so that meant I would ideally be in bed by midnight, if not earlier. During the school year, I got a little slack because of my schedule, but I still woke up before 10am on weekends.

Recently Holcomb and I have been staying up till 2am and sleeping in till 11am or noon. The amount of sleep is perhaps forgivable, afterall, we are swimming at least 20 laps practically everyday, but at least for me, the laps are more invigorating than tiring, inevitably. The sleep schedule seems to have grown out of video game playing and TV watching (or show-watching on the computer). The schedule is strange to both of us. I have not slept like this since high school, when I would do so whenever possible. College was a time of good sleeping for me, I kept pretty good schedules. This probably annoyed various friends who wanted to hang out for longer, and a (now ex) boyfriend who liked to stay up till 4 or 5am, but was forced to sleep earlier because I could not sleep knowing he was still awake somewhere in the house, and being awake in the room while I slept was out of the question.

What is the allure of the night-owl life? I have always found it appealing, though hard to maintain. My dad has always enjoyed the late-night/early-morning hours, I can recall many times that my mom told me in the morning that my dad had been up until 2am again. Is that so late? For certain lifestyles, yes of course. What is the allure for me? There is something romantic about the late-night hours that I could never understand. Maybe it is simply the darkness. It's certainly not the television shows. What is it about darkness that holds an appeal for observation? We cannot see much anyway, no matter how good our night-vision may be.

There is something exciting about what you cannot see, but you know is there. Darkness is like fire: it is obviously there, but it is not tangible, it cannot truly be held or processed. Fire is always moving, and the darkness has no shape. What *is it* about these things that we find so intoxicating? Fascination of the unknown.